NO NEWS IS GOOD NEWS

THE ONION (DC) - NEUTERED SUB GENRE - 9/08

WASHINGTON CITY PAPER (DC) - CONSTANTLY PREGNANT - 2/09

ANTI GRAVITY MAGAZINE (NEW ORLEANS, LA) - INTO THE VOID - 3/09 

-

MAXIMUMROCKNROLL
TURBOSLUT - This is the sound of four maladjusted but deeply creative
DC girls finding camaraderie in catharsis in the midst of doom and
personal insanity.  None of these six songs sound the same, but the
whole that is greater than the sum of its parts include: brooding
riffs and faux-cheery spastic leads that shift in mood over the course
of the song, disturbing quasi off-key harmonizing and vocals that also
continually shift (with three out of four members singing at different
times), the song “Dry” reclaiming hardcore gang vocals for the weirdo
girls, the six minute “Breaking Rank” that makes the listener feel
they are trapped in a personal labrynth, and various collected samples
that serve as seamless segues and seem just as essential to the songs
as any of the music. (Dan) (6-song cassette, lyrics included,
turboslut.org)

-

LAYLA GIBBON
5. Turboslut may be the absolute worst band name of the year, and in places it gets a little Heavens to Betsy cutesy rage rock; riot grrrl vs foxcore style if you want the rock journo music tags. But when they are on it, they have this total Nog Watt mutant-girl sound that’ll make you wanna start your own Manson family. All lady-made tuff, gnarled-up thrash tapes can be gotten here: turboslutsavedmylife@gmail.com

-

“I don’t really even know how to describe TURBOSLUT. I just heard screams and distortion. That’s not a diss by the way. You dudes were very loud.”
- Jeffrey Steven Gerhart, Mayor of New Orleans.

-

 ”Turboslut’ı ise myspace’lerinden bilirdim -geride bıraktığımız yıl, Pygmyler ile bolca turladılar. Müzikleri pek benlik değil açıkçası; tuhaf, ritmi bozuk garage sesleri, çekilmez bir vokal: Garip bir tamamı-kız grup.”
-Deadfm

–

HEATHEN HARVEST
“ILLUMINATING THE POST INDUSTRIAL UNDERGROUND”

Turboslut is a cult located in the woods of the Maryland communities and areas surrounding Washington D.C., the occult and political capitol of the United States of America. Currently on a hiatus due to the drummer moving to a wolf sanctuary for the time being, this cassette tape is the only way to hear this group until the prophecy is fulfilled and Turboslut returns to the stage. Opening the gates with “Too Little Too Late,” all of the lyrics on this release are heavily cryptic accusations and angry howls directed at individuals who are in their path. Various samples do much to flesh out the vibe and philosophy of the four ladies involved, but it is the music itself that does the most to explain what Turboslut’s intentions are.

-Joseph Gates
(CLICK TO READ THE COMPLETE REVIEW)

 —–

From “HEY IRONY I WANNA BE FRIENDS“

  I only spun that side for about the first month this record was in my hands, but I knew that one day I would have to flip it over and spin Turboslut’s side. When I did, I was fucking steamrolled. The first song, “Speed,” starts off with this killer slow, pseudo-Sabbath out-of-tune riff while one of the girls in this band spits some of the most miserable, negative lyrics I’ve ever heard. “This is awesome,” I said to myself as I gazed wide-eyed at my ceiling and listened to four women tear my ears apart. The genre I’d generally put this in is the ever-controversial “grunge,” but this “grunge” does something for me that Pygmy Lush can’t do, even though PL are my favorite band going right now (and it just occurred to me that Turboslut are not. R.I.P.). Honestly, I put this more in a league with Master of Puppets, Black Ships, and the mighty Sabbath themselves: I just grit my teeth and bang my fucking head and yell along to some of the words, and believe me, shit like “Gut my arms like fish/armpit to wrist, armpit to wrist” is great to speak and think about. It occurred to me after I dazedly put the record back into its sleeve that Turboslut are also unique in another way: they’re the first “female” band I’ve ever heard to not seem dominated by the need to be respected, or to need to prove that “chicks can rock.” Actually, as I was typing that, the Vivian Girls came to mind, but Turboslut are like the negative of them: their music is anything BUT cute.

All in all, I have an inkling this split (yes, a split) is going to be one of the most enduring albums of 2009 for this year. It’ll probably get bumped out of #1 by the new Darkest Hour, but I’m not even sure The Eternal Return will have the staying power of this. Yes.